your transformation into a slut upon entering college is like a shakespearian tragedy
God. I'm so broke I don't even have a dollar to snort my adderall through.
Just once id like to sleep with a man who i havent thrown up on
The doctor said 'youre the 2nd youngest person that ive seen with this condition. Thats probably not the silver medal you were looking for today.'
They really brought out their best strippers for vday weekend
You need an intervention. You fell into traffic walking home.
Not really. Birthday weekend. Totally jusifiable. Besides I didn't get hit. No harm no foul.
FRIENDSHIP PRAYER: May the crabs of 1,000 whores infest the crotch of the person who fucks up your day
He led me to his room and handed me the remote, he left to go take a shower and there is a group of guys across the hall just staring at me... Its like they know something i dont. Help me.
I'm actually drinking gin and juice out of a floridas natural carton...so if that has any indication of how I'm doing
Gay bathhouses. They're actually a thing. So god does exist. And he doesn't hate me as much as you think he does
I just got a free round of shots. Don't you DARE fuckin tell me that A-cup boobs can't get you good things.
we had sex while we waited for the thai food... a which will come first type of situation
I walked over and you were apologizing to him because you're lady gaga and he's not. The best part was that he forgave you.
he ended the message XOXO, who the fuck does he think he is GossipGirl.
She walked up to me and whispered "I hope you're good at sex" and led me to the beach.
Randomize
