one should ask oneself what kind of lifestyle one is leading when one finds a handprint of semen on their pillow the next day.
I made a game called come to class high and eat nachos.
he was fingering me, then looked down and said "i like your socks"
yeah, and when i walked in on them fucking he said "go away, i'm making sons."
No its cool I don't even have to do anything he is rapping to one of the strippers. He is punishing himself enough.
i mean i should have known that when i started taking shots with my zumba instructor i was in for a rough night...
Using 'equal to a modern day cock block" in term paper, inappropriate
Its pretty simple actually, if she texts me either Grr or Rawr it means she is horny and wants to bone. its a perfect system
if Anne Taylor knew what she did in her clothes, she'd be banned from the store.
oh come on, it's the perfect length summer dress to blow a stranger in the bathroom in
Oh my god I would go to planned parenthood the same day I get my nipples pierced
Reasons why I'm always right: I am older, I am wiser, I have a larger penis
I'm pretty sure the guy who was grinding on me while I was trying to get a drink at he bar was one of my tinder matches
I fell into a police barricade, a cop helped me up and asked if I've been drinking. I just looked at him and said "dude.." He proceeded to take out his handcuffs
only you would understand that I was talking from the perspective of my boobs
will you help me invent vagina-safe pop rocks?
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