Yeah unless I can find some idiot to make love to
it was one of those movies netflix should have sent weed with
I feel like somehow my uterus ended up in my ribcage from all the keg stands i did last night..
um, yes. it's my birthday, of course there will be acid.
Laurln. I am dying. I am npt alive. Adderrall is not a real thing. Death is a rwal thing which I understandably
How do I tell a friend I drunkenly broke into his house and may have lost his dog
Found trail of ibuprofen on ground. I'm like the intervention version of e.t.
I dont even think your gonna like what I got you for christmas. If not we can take it back and get drugs.
He said the first movie he ever jerked off to was Titanic because he knew "they were totally doing it in that car."
He managed to crash an entire train of shopping carts into a wall. I think he noticed my implants.
Did I tell you guys I was bisexual last night? I just had a flashback
While having sex, a German accent isn't sexy.
"The More You Know"
There's a weed, money and oreo filled pinata promised for our party.
I'm at a Tim Horton's and two girls just came in handcuffed to eachother
is it sad that the highlight of my saturday night was waiting till 3 in the morning to hear about your saturday night?
Randomize
