Yo I charged a $20 breakfast to ur room, will pay u back in liquor and schoolgirl panties, thx again for a fun time
I just pynch a tree in the face
all ten of us were sitting in his room with the lights off and staring at his colorful moving screensaver for two hours. That high.
Please tell me nicole sent the picture of the ejaculating penis to you too, otherwise I'll feel really awkward
Tidal wave of highness just hit. Find shelter and catnip. gloves. zebra striped car washes.
Note to self: last nights makeup does NOT, under ANY circumstances, look good today.
YOU TOLD ME THAT YOU CAUGHT A TAXI HOME. SARAH SAID THE POLICE DROPPED YOU OFF.
You made a glowstick headband with a helium balloon tied around it and climbed a tree in high heels. I was impressed.
I probably should have waited until after the game to pity fuck him. You know, seeing as we lost.
I realized I used a copy of a biography of JFK as pillow last night...
Happy Fourth.
If you don't wanna wax my ass just say so.
I almost don't wanna have sex with her because I'm afraid she'll steal my hat
I had to reschedule my trainer meeting so now I'm just here eating hot pockets
Do you think if I explain to her I want to have loud, unprotected sex with her sister she'll understand?
What do you want. Tryin to service my husband like the good wife that I am. It is bj Tuesday
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