More dangerous that a broken heart and a shotgun.
I tried booty calling last night but apparently he was too tired and wants to meet up tonight. I told him planning defeats the purpose.
would you consider him our boss?
technically yes
then technically i slept with our boss
he said my vag tasted like ravioli n pennies... i forgot I was on my period
what age do we have to be before we can stop fucking guys on the first date?
i just ran into our bio chem professor at the bar. apparently, he doesn't follow the "no slapping your students' asses" rule.
Doctor said I have sports induced asthma.
Call me old fashioned, but around here we call that "out of shape."
The fact that you think you peed off a roof shows you shouldn't have been on a roof.
i just won "most creative" category in the condom contest in human sexuality by licking it onto a cucumber. my feedback forms included three phone numbers, one with a Magnum XL taped to it
All I know is he mentioned whips, leather cuffs, and a riding crop. It's like Halloween, Christmas, and My birthday all in one. a 5 year old couldn't even possibly be this excited.
I just want to know what horrible accidents of evolution allowed that tiny penis to exist
Dude, she doesn't even live here... She just can't eat all our food and masturbate on my dog's couch...
That moment when a stripper is the one that makes the two of you have to define the status of your relationship...
You wanna come over?
Too high to be booty called. My cereal is growing hair.
He said he broke his back in 3 spots & my first thought was "there goes my booty call".
Did u have a 2nd thought
I need a new booty call.
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