apparently, it's not a good idea to make jokes about sending newborns through airport security xrays. the moms dont see the humor.
But why'd she put it on the conveyor then?
I just foul balled at work. I had taken off my coat too… had to go to the sink wash my hands then go back to the stall and pick up my coat. I hope the guy shitting in the stall next to me didn’t figure out what happened.
He woke up next to me, said I "wasn't naked enough" and fell back asleep. I proceeded to blow him.
I found out what happened to my eye. I punched myself in the face.
I can't wait. Forget the royal wedding. This is the most anticipated hookup of 2011.
We're the only two others left at work. My internal monologue is going: TAKE ME. TAKE ME NOWW. ON THE COUNTER. IN FRONT OF THE MANAGER. JUST TAKE MEEE
I don't think boys are aware how difficult it is to take a picture of your own ass.
I'm eating cake, naked, in bed. I am GREAT at being single.
Someone drunkenly cleaned and organized my car last night... Nothing's missing, so that's a plus.
Yeah i just finished watching someone play ping pong with his penis it didn't fully register until after a few seconds
I'm 99% sure the Indians were high for thanksgiving and we should respect that by getting high too
If drinking had a "new high score" I think I hit it this weekend.
Hooray! My email address wasn't leaked by Ashley Madison!
I will chop off your penis
I'll pick u up. I have to buy a new sofa cover anyway. I swear I've never seem a girl cum like that before.
If hypothetically I needed to puke on the bus... how would I go about doing this.
Randomize
