I did that thing where I cum for no reason again.
I just found 22 drunken videos and 4 naked pictures on my phone. We'll start the bidding at $5
pretend to be my girlfriend and sign me up for tool academy
every single one of us blacked out. we woke up the next morning and it was like the night never happened. IT'S STILL A MYSTERY
Ya after that i took a dump on a car... We're definitely partying with him again
Since when do you have sex with people you have feelings for?
Dude you don't understand. I genuinely felt his soul's penis in my soul's vagina.
You left for an hour, then walked up to us at the bar, pulled 80 dollars out of your bra and yelled " drinks are on him".
Hah no, But it might feel like water boarding to my soul
Walt said he was feeding me so I wouldn't die. that's why there was pasta in my room
I FOUND AN AUSTRALIAN THEY CALL VOMMING 'RAINBOW SNEEZING' I'M NEVER LETTING HIM LEAVE EVER
I forgot that places existed where drinking on Sunday is frowned upon. It's just so unreasonable.
I'm watching Russian dudes pole-dance. For research.
No judgement. Sometimes you gotta twerk on a legends face.
Long story short I'm making an I'm sorry card for a girl I dont remember having sex with
SPICY FOODS AND BLOWJOBS DON'T MIX.
YOU SAID YOU'D TRY ANYTHING ONCE YOU LIAR
Randomize
