I saw your purple underwear in the road this morning.
Pregaming class all semester has made this final review session more like my introduction to the topic.
Been at work for four hours and just discovered the chairs in my office double as a napping surface. Most productive thing I've done all day
She just told me she blew the waiter in the bathroom. Should I still leave a tip?
She is singing the swedish chef song and throwing utensils. I love this place
WHO THE FUCK TAGS THEMSELVES AT COUNTY JAIL?!?!
Hey, ok if I kidnap you? I wanna test a theory.
He left his boxers here. Can I keep them and make a shrine or would that be creepy?
Yeah, so, that moment when the repair guy comes in and you see your cock ring on the counter one second before he does.
99% of the contents of my handbag are ketchup packets and condoms. I feel that says a lot about me as a person.
college girl with braces trying to flirt with you...time to go
90% sure I just sold adderall to my professor
100% proud
I’m honestly just flattered that you think I could make PornHub’s Top 10.
I think drunk me saved him in my phone as "beautiful man" to play a joke on sober me
I’ve officially bought the ticket for my future dick appointment 😂
Randomize
