i don't know what kind of porn he watches.. but that is NOT how you do it...
apparently the dude across the street has been dead for like a month. now I feel bad about pissing on his lawn
tequila makes me forget i have legs
Dude, smoked out of a pumpkin tonight. I like Halloween more now
I'm up to 9 pic of different guys. I need 4 more boys and each one of the 13 to submit 3 additional pics. I wanna make a penis deck of cards.
Now that we both have boys can we make up games that objectify them as sex toys?
You're just mad because I look hotter in my mug shot than you do in yours
So I know we're not talking about this anymore buuuuuut I left heel marks on the wall.
Hooked up with a guy solely because he had a chameleon. Priorities.
I. recorded a message of me yelling at myself to "get up out of that bed" and set it an alarm. REALLY loud
apparently I stole your wolf lighter. probably bc you made me howl while you puked over your deck railing.
Last night all you did was whine about how you needed something new and exciting
Is THAT why I woke up with dreadlocks?
Don't let me publish my memoir unless "hurt my ankle drunk irish dancing" is at least the title of a chapter because that is really the whole story of my life.
How many gummy vitamins can I eat before I die
I woke up using a beer can as a pillow. successful party?
Randomize