Ambien. No doubt about it.
Not good, Ive never been this late. We need to talk.
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I'm constantly one strobe light away from an E flashback
I kind of wish I was already fat. So I could eat all I want and not worry about getting fat. Cause I'd already be at that point.
her underwear stopped being sexy when i saw her pubes sticking out of the top.
I'm sorry I kept calling you a pussy... but to be fair, you were being a pussy.
I feel like I have heartburn in my nipples.
She cracked her neck before the blowjob and I knew shit just got real.
He told me that his favorite part about me is hearing my voice while we fuck. I think that was the nicest thing he has EVER said to me.
He just said Bill Nye is just a dude. If I ever considered sleeping with him, I never will now.
Teach me the ways of your demonic sorcery.
Okay I'm officially a Texan now, I banged a dude with cowboy boots
What made you think singing Silent Night while I was puking was a good idea?!?!
So many questions so I’ll prioritize. How did I survive last night?
I need dick so bad, I’m dressing sexy for the school pick up line and sports practices to entice a few of the DILFs
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