Yep Great. Apparently I didn't just say things once that night. Drink. Yell. Repeat.
U also mentioned u werent wearing any underwear hahahaha
Lol speaking of weird...he just sent me a naked pic of himself that said "meow" at the bottom.
I think thanksgiving was created so we could all be thankful that we're still alive after the night before.
You were petting your shoe and saying this makes me really happy
Thanks for FaceTime'ing with that ugly chick last night while me and her friend were in the other room. it's good to know I can still count on my wingman even when we're 2000 miles apart
Pretty sure I blacked out the last 48 hours, the last thing I remember is the 4 pm bar crawl on Thurs
Can you believe they're going to let me be a doctor?
I'm going to look like a jackass in the Mexican newspaper tomorrow.
Step one go to argentina step two fuck bitches it's a simple plan really
If 26 stitches didn't sober her up, nothing will.
And have you ever tried to explain a hickey to your own grandmother?
First encounter with a mirco peen. I was confused when he said he doesnt go down on girls. Cmon dude, practice on a peach.
He looks like an accountant with a secret kinky candy filled center.
That kid singlehandedly fucked the breakup right out of me. I'm only hooking up with Millenials from here on out.
I'm still drunk dear. I just woke up 3 feet from the front door with 20 dollars worth of taco bell in my hands.
i thought the time we went to a party with no shoes on was bad, how about the time you left with no pants on?
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