I know its small, but please -- stop calling it my "weenis".
I might get fired at work today. I had to prioritize. It's not my fault Cockasaurus came over.
omg. he's a virgin strip club employee who's going to college on a ping pong scholarship. this is unreal.
i'm moving back early just in case the freshmen need a tour of the school
oh right the one that ends on your bed
We need to stop celebrating holidays that dont belong to us
24 hours later and my vagina is still tingling. That good.
I almost caused an explosion; It's okay though. because everyone would have died having a good time.
I actually don't know if I can stand up. I just know better than to try
why does he always try to puke into shot glasses
I want to see boobs tonight. Like, real ones. Your ones.
I'm romantic.
So we stayed at his mom's and all got drunk and he and I hooked up in his old bedroom. Then his drunk mom came in and tackled us when we were still naked. Why does this keep happening to me?
He had an extremely smooth butt for a man with such rough hands.
We dated for a month and a half. he didn't like blow jobs. I honestly don't think he was human.
i need some magic done to my vagina
I have an aggressive hickey on my shoulder and it actually hurts.
Randomize
