I found somebody to have a 3 sum with
shutup! Who?!?
Hahaha April fools!
Something in my vomit makes me think I shouldn't have had that slurpee
i was that girl throwing up in the urinal. it was a dark moment in my life.
Dan marino should def buy this ambulance. But not this one. I'm gonna fuck this ambulance up
bah. we'll see. don't give yourself a boner of false hope.
What people don't tell you about near death experiences is they give you a full on chub
Now that makes it sound like you had sex with a guy in batman costume and you never took the mask off so you can't 100 percent be sure.
I feel like there is something fundamentally wrong with me as a woman. My initial text to you was "What's up, fuck bucket?"
we dropped acid in chinatown. worst. idea. ever. too many colors. and nobody has any idea where steve is.
How much weight does it take to launch a cat using a trebuchet vs the tension required for a catapult?
This place is full of unfortunate mustaches.
I wiped my ass with some girl's sock, I would honestly admit if I hate Caitlin's sandwich.
Fuck it, i havent messed around in half a year. I have sexual tension with a fire hydrant.
Dude, no, you tried to sleep on the stove. I mean. You were pissed when I stopped you... but I couldn't have you catching on fire in my house.
how did i manage to wake up with my bra on backwards?
Randomize
