i was looking up hair salons in ithaca for the wedding and one is a hair salon/ sake bar! you can have sake or champagne while you get your hair done!
question, how would one sake-bomb while getting hair done without getting a horrible haircut?
fighting downstairs. join me tonight to hear their makeup sex. also, let's make skittles vodka.
I'm pretty sure the new "vibrating mascara" is just a disguised dildo for those of us who are too ashamed to purchase a real one.
Well, at least their eye lashes will look good while they masturbate shamefully.
All signs point to mom being high. 1) making chicken at 2 am. 2) dancing to smooth jazz. 3) she asked where the peanut butter was
Got home. Hugged Mom. The look on her face indicated she noticed nipple rings.
let's just say if he has a penis and he hypothetically needs to put it somewhere... i would take care of that for him.
He's drinking 50/50 vodka/water out of a camelback. Disaster would be a compliment at this point.
Just so were clear I meant the head your face is on
Absinthe night with my dad again, I could get used to this being home thing.
just gonna show up naked this time. that way i dont have to worry about finding my clothes tomorrow
Basically I don't wanna put on pants...but I'm stoked for drinking my face off tomorrow.
I did a kegel this morning to determine if I had been penetrated during last night's blackout. Nope.
I can't believe i lost my ID... bringing my birth certificate to the club was a weird experience
We are taking a shrt nap on the sidewalk cme fine me if you want but dont wake me up
I kinda realized titty fucking is purely for our enjoyment, they dont really get much out of it, except for a guy sitting on them and and a dick bouncing of their chin
Randomize
