Never fear I pulled out... she had "lies about taking birth control" written all over her
Woke up in a closet. I'm not drinking till summer.
I just looked at the maps icon on my IPhone and "eR" was typed in the search address bar. I wonder if we ever got there.
it wasnt like "sexy" or whatever. like...she was smiling just standing there butt ass naked
tasteful.
His band may suck, but it's not like I'm sleeping with all of them.
Some great men died of syphilis. I accept your compliment.
This is the last weekend of getting drunk and having sex all nite with the plumber. I'm exhausted all weekend and I'm never going to finish the remodel at this rate
Last night was the twilight zone. We hungout with our 45 year old future selves and tried to fuck everything with a dick. Lets move forward from this.
Ill give you a 4 hour blow job if you make my nephew go to bed.
I just need three more girls to complete my 'Freak-a-leak' bang list. Know any girls named Zahra, Shavon, or Daronda?
No like you fell onto the fence. I don't even know how you got into the fenced in area.
i took a picture of my dick. with a stick figure drawn on it. and a paper hat taped to the tip. and i call i the mayor of Dickville
FYI: Brian said he left me in the bathroom Friday night to shower and 45 minutes later found me with a towel around my head, my pants on and holding my boobs. No more Jell-O shots for me.
And my cousin was so drunk he called an uber and instead he got into a cop car and they took him to the hospital
what food is Colorado known for?
Pot brownies.
Randomize
