just a heads up, there may or may not be a mailbox full of the leftover beer on the table in your basement.
I now have an ENTIRE drawer of unused disposable silverware from Boston Market... and you guys said I needed to "buy" kitchen stuff
you said you were a responsible adult. then you licked the wall.
He said my labia gave my vagina a "cute personality"
She gave me a foot massage while her friend rode me. Your gf puked into the oscolating fan. How were our nites alike?
She found my wedding ring, sallowed it and wished me good luck explaining it to my wife before walking out. Now what?
I put a zucchini in my pussy for you
What if for Halloween I paint my self gold and make sandwiches for everyone? I'd be a trophy wife! Get it?
I just puke and rallied at my anniversary dinner #winning
He literally said from now on he's always banging chicks with asthma becuas it's such an ego booster
He sent me a pic and then I suffered dick amnesia about the rest of that
I guess I was running around slapping people in the face with a slice of turkey telling them that the only way to beat alcohol addiction is to go cold turkey.
It was like a baby arm holding another baby arm holding an apple grove. Fuckin huge!
She's dancing around licking a fork of nutella. She is not sober.
Yeah. Of all the things to be cock blocked by a plague is the most unexpected.
Randomize
