I may have been to starbucks and 2 classes with balls still written on my face...
You said you wanted to go to louisiana and get arrested by Steven segal
at the topless march for equality..and wow.not all these boobs should be treated equally
Maybe if i steal enough bar glasses i can justify all the money spent i've spent there
I need you to send me a picture of your dick. I want to forward it to that girl and you and i both know you're more impressively sized
I kindof just wanted to go downstairs and let his dad know how good his son was at sex
Luckily my prof thought I was puking from nerves and gave me motivational mini speeches the entire final.
Just woke up and spent the first hour of consciousness throwing up with the Rocky theme song on repeat.
HE TALKS ABOUT HIS DICK IN THIRD PERSON ABORT MISSION ABORT FUCKING MISSION
I just used my citation as a bookmark. Want a beer?
Some days you ride the struggle bus. Other days, it gets a flat, the AC breaks, and you run over a bunny.
It's really hard to masturbate now that I live with girls who actually function before 11 am.
Like I thought me shitting my pants was bad today... Then the election happened.
It's 2017. Get with the program. Also remind me never to get margaritas with you ever on Cinco de Mayo.
Do you think Ashley had her twin sister tag in for our date? The sex was different and I think a mole was missing
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