We drank from noon till 5 am, there was adderall and nice jews involved it was just crazy
she was most def 27.5% uglier than a troll, but the sex was great
Just took my first sake bomb. I love japan
I mean we're not committed. He's my first choice, sort of like miller lite. When I'm at the bar I'm going to order one, but if they don't maybe I'll go for a bud or blue moon. I'm certainly not going to stop drinking
Said he had been eating pineapple for a week before our 1st date. Not sure if thankful for his consideration or offended by his assumption.
had my ear almost bitten off in foreplay. the sex gods do not like me.
hey. so did i get tied up by a jumprope last night?
one night of dollar margs at dinner and dollar beers at the bar later, i am throwing up in his shower and gurgling soap and water to kill the taste of sin in my mouth. dollar days need to stop endng like this.
I'm currently day drinking, studying and making corn. Don't tell me what I can't do.
You just can't finish a sentence that starts with "I may have drunk peed in the bed" with "do you mind if I skip work and sleep here?" Anyways, yeah still drunk at work.
we are not taking body shots with the irish cream
I told him I wish we were at my house cause then I could tell him to get out after we had sex.
then this guy just runs in screaming, "cant you see my daughter pissed herself???!!!" and that was the start of my 2016.
I woke up just like any other Wednesday. Naked on the floor, hungover and covered head to toe in lube
Why would you keep yourself in a sharting situation
Randomize
