I want to kish your cheek
My cheeks are in Michigan
Oh my lips are kind of stretchy
I can't sleep so instead I'm thinking of all the things I would love to do to you right now
That's weird, I usually just count sheep
it was like having sex with a tree stump
Just did a line with lance bass. Only in NY
and on the second day it was tequilla tuesday. and the lord saw it was good.
the back of my hand read, "say no to drugs." my palm read, "say yes to shots." when the fuck did I write that?
She had one unshaved part on her vagina that she called "the soul patch" I just didn't know what to think
YOU CAN'T JUST DO COKE AND THEN CALM DOWN
Awkwardly walking by your fuck buddy and waving a casual hi in his direction like nothing has happened is probably the best thing in my life
listen. he fixes things. buys me drinks and sticks his penis in my vagina. age means nothing at this low point in my life.
Went to night shots with Kayla... she punched this guy and I got his friends number. Not sure if she's the best or worst wingman ever.
Date #3: He brought me a mason jar full of organic weed that he grew on his property. Will you be the witness when we sign our marriage license?
I don't care if it's 2 inches or 20 I mean dick is dick
He was doing dishes, naked. I dropped to my knees and gave him head. Teamwork level- pro..
It's dangerous to be this horny at work. I'm gonna stain my desk chair
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