'Watching yourself cry on Photobooth' is the new 'watching yourself cry in the mirror.'
During the middle of giving him head, he flashes his phone and says "I like to watch."
please explain to me why there is a shopping cart in my living room.
The glockenspiel player has some booze though so hopefully the ride won't be that bad
Isn't it statistically impossible for THAT many ugly people to be in one place at one time?
Im blasting "Fat Bottom Girls" as loud as humanely possible in attempts that old ladies doing water aerobics will take the hint and get the fuck out of the pool.
That's the second time in a week someone has called me to talk drunk you into getting up off the floor. This needs to stop.
Just watched a drunk girl hand her valet ticket to a cop and walk away.
Bless her heart. Her stupid, drunk, adderall-ed heart.
Jailed a totally belligerent hot guy. That was probably my most thorough pat down. Ever.
She said she wanted you to slurp her vagina like a spaghetti noodle.
Specially since he wanted to forget that we even touched, which makes it funnier because I don't think you can take back licking someone's butthole...
Would it be weird to bake him a cake that says "sorry I peed on your bed"?
Cheese, the small of a woman's back, the universe, mountains, vampiric demons, sleep, and dreams.
So we'll go out later for condoms and cake batter... aka grocery shopping for champions.
Randomize
