They want to listen to Lady Gaga while they puke.
I just wanna not walk straight. Is that too much to ask for?
Literally just spent 45 minutes converting my paintball gun to shoot condoms....
The google font looked peculiar last night, but then up close I realized it was just dry vomit.
I just wanna go home eat some pizza rolls, get warm and jerk off, and it's only 845. This shit was supposed to make me see unicorns. Not cry
I don't remember. I remember laying in the trunk of a car. For hours.
she screamed "gravy"!!! in the guys face and then stole the very large mans food in line ahead of us... that was just the beginging of the police report.
if she didnt wantt to be febrezed, she shouldnt have smelled so desperate.
foreskin is a definite game changer
I told him he wasn't aloud to one word text me. Unless that one word was threesome
It's a 'fuck poison control' kind of night.
okcupid is pretty much insisting i hook up with this chick who looks like andy milonakis.
40s are totally the cure
WHO DOES THAT ON A TUESDAY? This is not a Drake joke, the girl doesn't turn up OR down. She doesn't do anything.
He screamed, "Let there be light!" when he came
Randomize
