Im watching he's just not that into you, eating way too much pizza, and feeling very single.
i caught a guy at work today stealing condoms. i let him go when i realized that they were extra small.
By the way, shout wipes are a gift from god for people that throw up on themselves.
Explain to me how "cheap asian titties" is a complement?
That's two mile stones in one shot. A ginger and that's my third ashley.
she was masturbating to a video of herself masturbaing. She's a keeper
Drinking with mariachis at jimmy johns.
We're watching a video in class about cheese. The scoring for it sounds like that of a Lifetime movie. My mind is creative. I've continued my own story in my head of a wheel of cheese that was raped and murdered. It's so sad. I hope they get the guy. Btw, the video is about marketing.
What happened with the girl wasn't a gay thing. It was just a mutual respect and want for sex. The guys just weren't there.
Call it what you want. You fucked a girl.
Standing here wondering if its a good idea to cook pork chops in the toaster or not.
A gay dude just spanked me with a nicholas sparks novel and called me foxy. I'm putting this on my resume.
Meanwhile I'm googling glory holes in Vegas
Beer bong just needs to be rebedazzled but it's gonna make it
I'm nothing if not determined to sleep with everyone at that company
I thought it was your cat but I was wrong your Roomba is possessed by a pissed-off evil spirit.
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