are you still at the devil's house?
I was so high I couldnt even listen to music i was terrified of the potential knowledge i would gain.
Found a beard hair in my crotch.... care to explain?
Yeah I just gotta do it so that my major doesn't find out. Doesn't look good having a stripper teach your 3rd grader
theres chocolate ground into my couch, nerds candy all over the floor and cocaine on every surface. great memorial day weekend and yours?
Nhl reached an agreement. I plan on getting me some celebratory sex from a hockey player.
Anywho, an ostrich attacked me today. Fucking useless pieces of shit birds.
when my phone is in portrait view you can just assume i've been watching porn. that's the only thing i want to see in full view.
Justin just used the term "industrial strength colon blow".
They had to take me to the ER because I got a concussion in a parking garage. Not partying with lesbians for a while
Guess who just bought an ounce of pot via Paypal, and paid for it with my airline Visa card to earn miles?
Congratulations. That business degree is finally worth every penny it cost you.
It was like 10 tiny penises being shoved in my vagina.
don't bring your nerd jargon into this conversation about my naked body
And today, on Faces I'd Like to Sit On .... The starting line up of the German National Football team
He put on star wars porn, i thought it was hilarious last night but now i'm wondering why he has star wars porn
Randomize
