you kept searching pizza on facebook and becoming a fan of each page dedicated to it
So I feel bad, Ross is asking questions, I think they need to know it's a Spanish lesbian bar
Did you really just text me at 6:35 in the morning asking where the condoms were? I moved out a year ago.
When we found you, you were using the bottle of Captain as a pillow...with a note on your forehead that said don't wake up the champion.
he's hot he just has too much baggage, and has really fucking skinny ankles which freaks me out
you aren't having sex with his ankles, As long as knee caps and above are good, i'd go for it
We don't really communicate like that.
Communicate like what?
Communicate like people who want to see each other when their genitals are inside their pants.
We did a lot of coke and Bedazzled the couch. It seemed like a good idea at the time.
We got a standing ovation as security was escorting us out of the ballpark, it was a proud moment
She had a belly button piercing in the shape of a cross. Talk about mixed messages.
When you wake up to a porn star on your couch telling you, you better tell your boyfriend about last night.
i think i just lost a toe
I may have just sent her dad a picture of my penis. His name's Myron, right?
Sexting just isn't as much fun once you learn how bad he is in bed...
i don't like interrupting booty calls. thats just rude.
No I didn't say it was safe, I said it was legal. I didn't say anything about it being safe. It's not my fault if you weren't listening properly.
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