No touching my privates on the ride to school. Pinky swear.
I didn't think I could chip a tooth while giving a blowjob until I met him.
med student doing my blood work at the AIDS clinic just hit on me after I told him i was having unprotected sex, but didn't think i had HIV.
i just snorted adderall with my patient's rolled up EKG strip from our last clinical. nursing school has ruined me. thought you would appreciate this.
I just had a threesome in the back of my mom's van. I'm pretty sure the rest of my week is going to be epic.
He left npr on the whole time when we were doing it. ironic that i lost it on the 100th anniversary of the titanic. thanks michelle norris.
From now on when a guy sends me a dick picture I'm going to send them a picture of some other dudes dick.
I took your mattress from your bed. Don't ask questions. Love you. See ya later.
Oh Julie took your pants off last night, I put your pajama bottoms on, and Rachel took your bra off. It takes a village.
He slapped my ass and his clap-on light turned on.
So... crashing at the hot bartender's place is not a solid marital decision.
I know we were going to go hiking today, but I don’t think I can face reality until Wednesday
I can't believe I'm coordinating a threesome at work. My productivity is at an all time low.
falling asleep on a hardwood floor changes a person
You know that panicky moment when you go home with a guy and realize you’ve been there before?!? HAPPENING RIGHT NOW!!!
Turns out I banged his son a few months ago but the kids back at college so I don’t have to worry about him walking in while Dad has me bent over the couch
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