i am a beautiful darrk chocolate womann
honey you're def caucasian
i am a beautiful white cholcllate woman.... Z
the night i cant remember will be the night i always remember thanks to my "i
I'm either too drunk or not bisexual anymore
When god put her together, he was drunk & feeling creative... a vagina here, sexually ambiguous breasts there, and a pair of shoulders that would make a linebacker jealous
she looked me in the eyes and called me a poet because i was singing lady gaga, then she fell over...
You brought back some girl with you at 3am and introduced her to everyone as "hot pocket"
All I could understand from his text was "hatchet" "soccer" & "bitch". its safe to say andy has had enough to drink & will be violent soon
Just realized I lost my social security card...maybe someone else will do something with my life
this lady just pulled corn on the cob out of her purse
People like that make this world a better place.
I think a kid would responsible me up
I know of an excellent nanny. A lot like Mary Poppins but way cooler. And likes pot.
I learned a very valuable lesson tonight...don't touch a cops tazer
It's the kinda thing that makes you wanna buy a rainbow flag and fight republicans and kiss girls
I just called my grandma crying, apologizing for being the first grandchild to have premarital sex...I'm either about to start my period or pregnant.
well i blew him then my wife blew him, so im guessing we'll be seeing him around, yeah
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