I'm going to an arts college, I live next to the frat houses, and my room number is 420. god has plans for me and I couldn't be happier.
I feel like my whole life has been one big pre-game for Mexico.
So apparently the christmas orgy was a complete disaster
i now officially have to be stoned in order to look like my passport when i go to a different country
He was drinking wine out of a pyrex measuring cup at two in the afternoon and told me my ass looked fantastic in my sweatpants. I love university
Finding a keg in our kitchen would be like god personally high fiving each of us.
He smells so good today
Seriously, back away from the sexual harrasment suit.
Please put me in a whole with no windows and never let me out.
We put your drunk ass to bed. 10 minutes later we heard you scream "DICK-PUNCH!!!" It was immediately followed by a shriek of pain and crying. So to answer your question; no, that's not "sex soreness".
She said "we just have chemistry" ... I wanted to say "no, you just have a vagina."
I've now fucked in every motel room in this small town.
Pennsylvania now holds the distinct honor of being the third state I've crapped my pants in.
I got in an argument over whether or not I'm a slut. I argued yes.
I came so hard my ears popped.
FYI - Don’t go in the downstairs bathroom. Ryan is passed out naked on the floor with a raging hard on.
Randomize