how do chicks with those acryllic nails wipe their anuses?
I just made a friends list on fb of all the guys ive hooked up with. genius.
ra ra ra ah ah
wtf?
sexting lady gaga style
ya i found him eventually. hes the only one who drinks guiness so I just had to follow the darkest green puke trail
so im gonna ask for shark week off tomorrow at work and i advise you do the same
Just sold this kid "Magic Furry Apples". He is way to high to figure out they are just peaches.
At least he's a nutritious stoner...
I'm really proud of her, she waited until she was on tiled floor to start puking on the ground
Currently in the bathroom stall of a gay bar in new haven giving myself an anti throw up pep talk
I need to stop drinking and eating and start working out. I look like the lovechild of John Goodman and Jabba the Hutt.
we should look into getting a golf cart for the weekend. i have a feeling legs wont be a sufficient source of transportation.
ummm im also counting the $14 dollars I gave the old guy to pay for the cab I called for him to take to the hospital last night as part of ur present.
I'm sitting in my 10 am lecture drinking a flask out of a dorritos bag...I think people are starting to notice but I'm already too drunk to care
Can someone please explain where the fish in the mason jar came from when we were at a bar all night?
You told the bartender if he gave you one of the fish you'd go away
does having sex with an episode of House playing in the background count as studying for my MCAT?
In this house, we have but one simple rule: DONT FUCKIN TOUCH MY STUFF OR I'LL CUT YOUR NECK IN UR SLEEP
Randomize
