so I was just driving high and I stopped to let a pinecone cross the road because I thought it was a hedgehog.
I love the progression of these pictures. I go from cute to Courtney Love
He bought me flowers. The card with it said: Sorry I cant get you off. I will try harder.
when she said she was from California you started sobbing. You begged her not to melt your popsicle because you paid good money for it and you just wanted to eat it in peace.
There was a picture of him proposing on the night stand and their dog watched, but I can't help myself, his dick is just so perfect.
He made me a period mix..should I back out now?
I dont care what I am for halloween, as long as i'm not a father after
I just used my glow stick from the dance to find my way in the bathroom to puke. Who wants me on their corporate team
I just want to steal his innocence through his penis. I really do.
it's gotten to the point where there are no existing good choices. even our good choices are bad choice by anyone's standards but ours.
Codeine + Boredom = Sprinting between my front and back door.
I found all these half eaten mandarin orange on the ground and the bruises on my neck are definetely not hickies
I wish to strangle
whoa there darth vader
Just learned a valuable lesson today. Don't open snap chats from 3 am the next morning while sitting next to a small child. They totally saw your dick.
He came into my room last night and started peeing underneath my desk, I told him the bathroom was the next door over.
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