Dude ... paraplegic porn is really creative..
it's not the walk of shame if you do it in cowboy boots.
I was thinking about him in the shower then i get out of the shower and there was a text from him
its like he has a camera inside of my shower that looks into my brain
Squirrels and blue jays and dove-like things. They're just frolicking around in my backyard. I wanna be like them.
I vomited in the sink and my bra was in there...I don't even have words to describe this hangover confusion
Second night back. Go to house party and played ring of fire. Me plus five other people completely naked. College wins.. It's going to be a long semester
and then you looked me right in the eyes and said "i just really wanna pet some horses right now"
Idk we were snorting lines and making out in the stall while these people were cheering us on, on the other side. And that's when I realized he wasn't the only guy in the girls bathroom.
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I have a very important question for you: what are some good rules to have if we want to turn the nfl draft into a drinking game?
I got dressed on his front steps, peed on his neighbors lawn, then did a shoeless walk of shame home at 5am...
He is always putting motivational shit on FB. So its like i know hes sad lonely and looking at internet porn. Break up winning
I was in a competition with shots tonight...shots won.
I'll do whatever I want when I'm 80.
If you are still alive at 80 I demand a medical explanation.
Jarrod's passed out on the chair with a cup of milk and I've been staring him down in an attempt to use telepathy to make him spill it. Attempts unsuccessful.
Randomize
