if there is a rhyme for it it must be true
Would you object to my putting the bidet video on my Facebook page? It;s awesome.
But never have I ever had sex with a dirty talker before, so it was something else, to say the least. I signed up to get laid, not play Penthouse Mad Libs.
I puked last after eating a volcano taco and drinking vodka. I felt like a fucking dragon.
just got passed by a van of kids watching the little mermaid. debating speeding so i can watch
Didn't u have court just yesterday for ur driving?
IT'S THE LITTLE MERMAID! totally worth another year of probation
It's ok. I will share any beautiful men that I drug and leave unconscious on my bed. I'm that kind of friend.
The two girls sitting next to me are asking siri "Like, uh, how do you know my name?". Do I fuck with them or fuck them?
I am tired of banking on my penis size to overcome my lack of game.
I also made him write a nonfiction romance novel about what happened and to give it to me when the time was right
I smell like a skunk, but I'm okay with that.
I've never been this drunk around this many toddlers
Funny you say that, I just sold my stripper pole to my mom tonight...
The man sent me a video of him doing the helicopter, the least I can do is go visit him in the hospital
If you binge watch Bill Nye Saves the World without me you can consider yourself single
God does not give you boobs that amazing to not share them with your friends
Randomize
