so the guy who showed me the apt today is now texting me and asking me out for drinks...he's at least 20 yrs oldr than me and highlights his hair, but part of me is wondering how low i can talk him down in rent during sex? wrong?
I have show me your genitals stuck in my head. Except in spanish. Muestrame tus genitals. Tus genitals.
Her vagina is like Vegas. high traffic and full of glitter.
btw i have an angry voicemail of you yelling at me to get you a sandwich or die.
I say we get drunk before the exam tomorrow. At least then we have a valid excuse for failing.
She told me my parents were awesome for leaving me uncircumcised...
you just stood there spinning and got mad if anyone tried to stop you
Picture this: me driving down 183 throwing up into a towel. I just hit rock bottom.
Ive only seen a dude masterbate on a train twice, once on the Jtrain and once on the Ftrain... trust me you never wanna see where the subway turns around.
I woke up five hours later with a mouthful of Jimmy John's while clinging to my sandwich.
Welp just pooped in a garbage can. Guess I'm not better than you at life in any aspect.
All I know is I want him to tie me up at least twice a week and I have an overwhelming urge to cook for him. Could this be love? I'm so confused....
I just need a big sign that says no more penis please hanging over my head at all times
you had me at "meet me in the bathroom"
you tried to fight the cop who was busting the party, you said you had a constitutional right to do a keg stand...
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