ur plase or mine? lol
well if you don't learn how to spell, you may be at your place and I'll be at mine.
that shit musta been laced I laughed for two hours and everyone looked like penguins
I could've eaten a live cat and wouldn't remember it today. That level of drunk.
I deem it safe for us to drink together again.
They dropped the charges?
Yeppers. Come drink beers.
I cannot be this high in this house. This house has so many of my secrets in its walls.
I've made a list of places I want to have sex this summer. #1: Reptile House at the zoo.
Woke up on a mattress on a roof this morning with a pair of briefs next to me. Oh fleet week.
I know you`re my best friend, but when i wake up with this bad of a hangover and no memories of last night, i dont want to see your tits ad my background.
You've thrown off my entire schedule. Usually SATURDAYS are my "try to hide the jizz on my leggings" days
WEED IS MY SPIRIT ANIMAL
That one probably shouldn't have been in caps
So how did it go?
I'm not sure if it was all the eggnog or all the alcohol, but hosting an eggnog pong tournament was a mistake.
Apparently, acid is a good substitute for cash if you don't have any! Who knew?
Exactly man. Who needs doctors when you have vodka and hot knives.
If you're with any of them tell them i apologize for (insert whatever i did here)
Yes be both agreed it was the worst sex in the history of fornication, so I asked him to sign the condom wrapper so I could frame it as a reminder to NEVER sleep with him again
Randomize
