nut hugger
Not a fireman, but good enough for last night.
I'm pretty sure that he just gave me the ginger disease
I'd be more interested in girls if they were more interested in anal.
I wish I could get plan B off e-bay so it would be a secret and cheap.
when I woke up I found a half-eaten cherry toaster strudel sandwich with bacon in the middle.
She put baby oil on her toes and i am not legally allowed to talk about what happened
After he finished his girlfriend called him. I sat there, tied his shoes for him, then he high fived me and said "this is gonna be a great summer steph"
There's something odd about buying beer for the first time while wearing my school sweater from kindergarten, but I don't mind.
I've already agreed to hook up with 3 people tonight, and its not even 2:00 yet... I think this is what the path to success looks like.
my dad pointed to my full beer and said drink up we're leaving now.
can you adopt me?
That is was cool to fuck the single mother accross the street until every girl i bring home gets the car keyed.
She just won 2 Grammys at 17 and were sitting here hotboxing our half bathroom
he just fucked me for my cheese.
Never thought I’d use my computer science degree for teledildonics, but here I am
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