her last google searches are 'cheap african safari' and 'what does lion taste like'
Her facebook status is 'PERCS ON DECKKK~' which is probably why she still lives with her parents.
I want to see you in more than a weed delivering capacity
I can't wait to find out the true size of his penis! Please maintain enough sobriety for an accurate report.
Thought it only fitting this Jubilee weekend to snort lines with a 50 note
Your patriotism amazes me, the Queen would be proud!
I know it I should, but it's kinda nice. It's smells like unbridled enthusiasm and copious amounts of melt your face off sex.
My aunt comes over, haven't seen her in 4 years. First thing, looks me up and down and goes "...yup, that pair ripened nicely. Theyll get you some free drinks"
I think you were raised by the wrong sister
we're drinking bellinis i mean god's titty nectar
if elf comes on TV one more time i swear to god i will smash my brains out with this fruitcake
Hi you snuggled with me in my bed in a maid outfit
Currently tripping balls and watching Pink Floyd the wall and I'm crying during it. If this isn't a self realization then I don't know what to tell you.
I just realized it's officially fall..I had sex while watching Halloween
dollar rum and cokes, see you on the dark side of infinity
part of it says your brother mayyyy have put his lips on my vagina
He's hot, clean, can actually cook, and best of all isn't a narcissistic prick. I found a unicorn.
Ride that fucker.
Randomize
