We can get Dustin to help us. I think he'd be good at luring girls into a dark alley.
make sure nobody uses the downstairs toilet. i like to have an unused toilet for the weekends. dont shit where you puke i always say.
Once two people had broken bones it had become a bulk hospital trip so we took the party bus
I just want to know who nailed the chicken nugget to the door.
She has a boyfriend. But if he's a decent human being he understands blowjobs don't count as cheating with her. Keeping those miracles to himself is a crime against humanity.
Drunbk and roasting marshmallows on my stove. Accidentally singed the catr's fur but she'sd alright.
You made out with two different species that night
In between rounds of sex, you stopped and did drunken handstand push-ups.
It feels like New Years Day all over again...me trying desperately not to throw up in the backseat & mom and dad blissfully unaware in the front
struggle bus is officially taking me on a road trip to hell. If this is just the first destination, I'll jump out the fucking window.
Sangria Flip Cup was probably one of our worse drunken decisions
Never do acid then ask for a blow job while watching 28 Days Later. Heed my advice.
So apparently last night while I was drunk I read him erotic fanfiction while he was eating me out. He stopped every now and then to give me feedback.
I wish I could open myself up and check on my liver. Make sure it's hanging on. Ya know?
We took three cabs to get home, the first one dropped us off a block away, so we went back to the hotel and tried again
Randomize
