how do you spell 'special'? like slow?
S P E L L C H E C K
No you dumbass thats not right
taking shots each time the weatherman says Dont go out in this blizzard
We woke up in an inflatable kiddie pool full of both empty and full beer cans. In the middle of his dad's office. Oh, and we were locked in. Nobody remembers.
If a video of someone that looks like me banging that chick on the hood of her car in some parking lot suddenly shows up on the web... let me know, I gotta see how that turned out.
Life is too short to have fake orgasms.
Come through the front door when you get here.
Right now I'm so wasted I can't determine whats a door and a window.
I think it's time for a new pick up line. So far my " hey you want to go back to my place, order a pizza and fuck?" Has set me at an all time low downtown 0/4
Geez don't go to a bar for a few days and everyone freaks out.
Yeah I would come and meet you but there's 3 polish girls yelling at a drunk polish guy in the carpark outside. They just dumped a whole pizza over his head and I want to see where this ends...
I can count on one hand the number of good things that happened over the past year.
Don't be upset because I bitch slapped you with intelligence
Bitch I slept on the ground 2 nights running
as a guy is it bad that even my mom called me easy?
I was a psycho gf all the time...I'm sorry
I was drunk 90% of the time...tit for tat
If you survived your 72 hour masturbation marathon put on some pants and come over. My mom dropped off a lasagna.
Randomize
