If she sucks any more cock I swear she will be a spermivore
I am now Facebook friends with Donkey Lips from Salute Your Shorts
My grandmother just explained bulimia to me as a diet
she said and I quote "NO SOUP FOR YOU!!!" and closed her legs.
I'm not going to need your "it doesn't mean you're a slut" pep talk after all.
i think i had to give the cab driver my id to get home last night because i couldnt talk.
I walked into my room to see them crying, watching hey arnold, and passing a franzia box back and forth...
Good news. Hiccups are gone. Bad news. I had to set the bathroom rug on fire to get rid of them. Don't come home until the fire truck leaves.
Reunion weekend was a success. Had 3 ex's inside my vag. Hat trick!
I've figured out why I love winter sex. Because I make them leave the beanie on, and we all know I love a man in a beanie.
I just really hate taking care of things... If I can't fill it with liquor I'm not sure what to do with it.
First day in a very long time I've done more pushups than bong rips
it'll be like a game of Russian Roulette, but with my vagina.
I blacked out and when I woke up and looked at the counter.. there was a full cake upside down. I dont even understand ...
I just spent 30 minutes plucking my 2 month grown out pubes with tweezers so I’m hope your night is going better than mine
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