You should never have let annie watch you have sex with other women
Dude, you just left me a 3 minute voicemail of pop rocks in your mouth. Im sitting right next you
Ever have the mailman look at you like youre a chronic masterbator. I have.
Pride was great cause we really can now appreciate how far we've come as gay people!
Doll, if you're still fucking strangers behind the WeHo Sonic while high on E then we've come as far as 2003...
He's a collector of sorts
Any cool stuff?
You should see the collection of booggers in the carpet next to his desk
some people wear their heart on their sleeve but you just wear your vagina on your face.
Just pulled an upper-decker at a hardware store. I believe I'm winning 8-2. It's obvious you don't shit enough in public.
You took a bag of frozen peas to bed wiith you "to help with the inflamation".
I just debated creating a mirror system so I could play Batman while in the bathroom. I think I need help.
I already knew that. But I also don't agree with stifling creativity.
At this point if I didn't go to work hungover I think the whole place would think something is wrong
Blah blah blah. Just come home and put a baby in me.
All I've had to eat today are potatoes...and by that I mean vodka and chips
Pooled our money and rented a bouncy castle for the day. Get over here now. Bring vodka.
i can eat my weight in tater tots. don't test me, bitch
I need my sock, sombrero, maracas, and I just heard I had a light saber, if thats the case...i want that back too
Randomize
