Yeah, i think she was German or something.
No dude, she's just got a speech impediment.
its summer. and we all know college gfs do not count in summer.
college gfs dont count ever. theyre like getting corn rows in jamaica. you feel cool at the time. then you go home and people make fun of you.
im doing shots everytime lil jon says it in the song shots....blackout town here i come
i've been fucking this guy since february and just found out he might be uncircumsized. currently google image searching to confirm.
Just when you think you're never going to have sex again, BOOM you're naked in bed with a guatemalan
Apparently I spent my 300 dollar tax return by ordering ramen on amazon last night. Please tell me this will somehow pay off in the long run.
he built a boat made of joints. holyyy shit
I swear the pregnant cashier was jealous when I bought my plan B
And the clouds opened up and the sex gods said I hate you alfalfa
The worst part about getting "creative" and by that i mean baked is that i just wanna get laid right now and all im doing is eating nachos
Dude. I've never been with a guy who just wanted to go down on me all the time including while I'm shooting zombies on call of duty. My life is complete.
TOPLESS DRIVE THRU! I have no money and my dignity is at an all time low.
Sarah is throwing up still and I'm eating salad with my fingers
Too stoned. Randomly can't get the image of Emilio estevez's smiling face out of my head. What is life.
I just quoted part of the Pokemon theme song in a sext... And it worked
Randomize
