Are you missing anything? I found a wedding ring in my bed this morning.....
If she's not going to maintain the upkeep of her vag then I'm not going to pay the rent of being her boyfriend
Every time a guy reaches down to touch my vag, i feel really sorry for all the transgender girls who still have a penis there.
That's weird cause every time i feel a girls vag i feel way worse for all the guys who reached down there and got a penis.
I feel kinda awkward using the Sesame Street themed Google to search for hot young pussy...
i'm starting to get really nervous about the relationship i have with my cat
She woke up 3 seperate times, each time she had a look of pure terror on her face, she had no clue where she was.
I wanna thank you for having such slutty friends growing up. Your a great little sister
and PS, please don't fuck in the corn maze, k?
you left saying you wanted to "go piss on that girl's doorstep" and we didn't see you the rest of the night
that actually explains a lot
We're going to catch a squirrel this summer
You should photoshop their heads on tigers first!!
For my parents' annivery card? How high are you?
my star wars tattoo got me laid last night. definitely a dark side sort of benefit im thinking
I said he looked like a lumberjack and that's when he came. I guess he liked the beard compliment?
Everyone is all excited about the iPhone 7 being water resistant and I'm only concerned with whether or not it can be destroyed by salsa or cum
I dunno. The drunker I get, the easier econ gets. I may be onto something here.
Randomize
