She wrote me a poem titled "Penis Flower" and it wasnt a joke
I just made easy mac in my blender. Beat that.
Your excuse of not making us Mac and cheese was that you couldn't find 6 cups of water...
No, the sea-green pills were klonopin, the bright blue ones are adderall. you're probably going to have to adjust your plans for the day.
I'm thinking I had intended to send you pics cuz I woke up naked
Sunday is a myth, I refuse to believe that I waste an entire day unable to function after a night of drinking.
I have acquired 14 pictures of hard dicks tonight... I was on a mission. Don't even pretend you aren't proud.
Stop making Mac and cheese and sit on his face. FINISH HIM
in the future when you find clothing in your street, just assume it's mine.
The only thing that got rode last night was the shit face train. I brought him home to see wht all the hype was about and he just started crying and puking in my bathroom.
Btw there's a hedgehog in my room. Don't get it high
A seagull just tried to steal my cellphone
I'm now at a gay bar with our relatives
Why would you trust me with ANYTHING!!!???
I want to start a guest book for my bed room so when dudes leave they can write a review
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