Screwed.edu
I just pulled a feather out of my vagina.
I am not joking.
my dad just beat the shit out of me cuz i blew my nose on one of my dirty t shirts and he saw it and thought it was cum.
No idea how i never noticed that penis before. I wonder if it works
all adderall does is make me the grand champion of using wikipedia.
Weird. Haha. I guess taking advice from batman is a good idea.
that's the nicest way anyone's ever asked me to send them naked pics before...
Are you seriously gonna shit with that life vest on?
he gave me a new purse full of weed and five boxes of samoas for my birthday. best boyfriend ever.
Thanks for pulling me out of the bed by my feet atleast one of us was sober enough to know I had work at 5 am.
Post-shopping-cart-scooter-jousting victory fuck?
Everything smells like blood and olive oil.
The boys wrestled in the living room for the last condom while the girls chanted, "THE LAST MELON."
it was good, but also weird. like, i came four times and then cried weird.
If you need anything just hit me up
Pancakes
Noted.
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