goodnight i made you a song goodbye
We tried having a conversation with our noses.
Im interpreting your silence as a silent plea for me to come wake you up. See you soon.
No, he grudge fucked my ex so I wouldn't be tempted to get back with her. He is either the worst or best friend ever.
The pick up line I used was "Grab my sack, you'll be back." Then I winked at her.
So i learned you can't hair-of-a-dog jaeger hangovers.
It's like my butt was the only innocence I had left and now I don't even have that.
You need to stop having girl talk with the guys I'm sleeping with.
hey fuckhead. when i said not to grow shrooms in our apartment, that didn't mean "yea, sure. grow shrooms in our apartment"
He spent like 5 minutes figuring out how best to position me so I would still be able to watch the game. Maybe there is a benefit to dating a guy who cares about me but doesn't care about my team.
Pretty sure this is the part where you go buy a ring.
I just want to return to LA when the weed and dick is plentiful.
You know that feeling when you wake up and your whole body just smells like a penis?
It's shark week go big or go home
In other news, I just threw up my burrito and am currently on all fours literally crawling back to my bed
I covered the puke with a shingle there's not many chunks. I think it will blend quickly.
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