I was able to overlook the Affliction tee until he took it off and there was another tattooed on his body.
Was it at least attractive minus the Gargoyles or skulls... or whatever affliction is putting out these days?
Even a greek god couldn't pull it off. Told him I like Ed Hardy Better. Death Before Dishonor, baby. I'm sure it was a painful blow. hopefully he understands sarcasm.
Can we reminisce? I held a mans penis while he peed. This is the craziest night I've ever had.
Just left some random in my bed to go get mcdonalds breakfast. I'd say my priorities are on point.
Did I show you my penis last night?
we were shitfaced at work by 8pm. I had to stop myself from pouring vodka in everyone's cappuccino.
I don't think child baring hips is a compliment.
Im sitting on the exxon bathroom floor, idk if its healthy but it sure is cold
I got kicked out of the men's bathroom at the diner last night because i was straddling the sink attempting to pee with pants on. Beat that.
Cant really say how it happened but i woke up in the middle of the night and somehow pissed all over connors dad
Is it normal that every guy I hook up with tells me my hair is sexy as it's happening? Like that can't be normal
So hungover and decided to eat a burrito and a pot brownie for dinner, this is what adulthood looks like.
he really is such a sweet guy. it’s a shame i have to break his heart.
Happy 4 year arrest-aversary! I promise no thanksgiving has been as eventful as that one haha..
You know it's a bad cold when sneezing feels better than orgasming...
I wore my old cheerleading uniform.. He came before I even touched his dick. Should I be irritated, or flattered?
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