Well to be completely honest its more of a 'i wanna do things to you that your parents would not enjoy hearing about' mood
I told her I had to go to work this morning, got fully dressed in a suit, walked her out, drove around the block, parked, and walked right back in my apt and went back to sleep..
He told me to pick a safe word. I said 'cactus' and he said I wasn't taking this seriously and that I wasn't cut out for s&m.
I totally need to blow more fat guys. His cum tasted like vanilla ice cream
is it just my freshly shaved vagina or is the guy at the end of the table pretty cute??
there's another hole in my ceiling...someone fell through the attic this time....
You stared at the ground for like 20 minutes willing yourself to get sober
I know that we've never been that tight but I want you to meet my cat before I move.
I built a fence. For the bunnies we're going to adopt. I'll fill you in when you get home.
I'm dying. The alcohol is viciously exiting my tiny body.
We need a full length mirror. I just ate it trying to look at my shoes on the toilet. But aside from a arm bruise I'm good to go
We trekked into the state forest, laid the comforter down and he proceeded to tell me that we could stay here and stargaze, turned me around and fucked me like the lion king.
I woke up in the basement of a pizza restaurant... I would say the tequila hit me pretty hard.
Did you actually just quote Ace Ventura during a sext!?
You know it
Dammit now I have to marry you
would it be okay if I showed up at your house naked? and is your door unlocked?
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