walkin around the woods blazed, drawing pictures of trees and plants, i get a grade for this
I wish i had a shirt that said, "I know what you're thinking and it's not herpes on my face"
theyre selling pepper spray in the courtyard. hellooo atl
My dora the explorer band aid does not cover up the shame i feel right now
You should have been there. We got drunk and threw a sword through his windshield.
NO YOU'RE NOT. I don't want to hear that SHIT. Jameson appreciation day part 1 is saturday and YOU WILL BE READY.
You swear the intervention is for her? I've fallen for that one twice.
In your defense, I really thought capturing that alligator would have been a lot more awesome and a lot less tragic.
RIP Mr Bojangles.
I will pee on everything he values.
What is their policy on bow ties and belligerence?
Why do I have a missed call from "The Anaconda" ?
I snorted xanax while wearing reindeer antlers. Prancer gone wild. Have a merry Christmas.
Agree to hang out with him and then take a gigantic shit right on him. Or if youve forgiven him for being a fucker maybe make out with him.
Sorry I blacked out in bed
it was real late and you were brushing your teeth with miller light. it was bound to happen.
You wouldnt listen to us when we told you there was no place that was selling girlscout cookies at 4:30am...
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