Sooo sorry about that. And crying. And comparing my life to a duck
almost just walked around my whole building with my bowl in my hand before i remembered 420 isnt a get out of jail free card
Passed out for 3 hrs til now to wake up naked on my bed covered with grass from drunk slip and slide I would call that success
No no no. When you take one for the team, there are no stipulations or conditions
I don't understand but I fell asleep naked holding a tub of cool whip and a boiled egg
He used the phrase "no problemo" in a sext. It's over.
That's what tomorrow is for. It's like bloodletting. Except with shame and liquor.
I wanna come do a blessing for your apartment. And by that I mean I want to drink a lot of whiskey and watch ancient aliens in your apartment
I should be done at 8 and I've also done a great Job of convincing my self that I should get really drunk tonight
Pretty sure the guy I hooked up with Saturday gave me a buy one get one free coupon for chipotle. Who said nice guys don't exist?
I mean, it was a fun hookup and he's cute and whatnot, but he wouldn't go down on me. Plus he's a republican. Idk why but those things feel like they go hand in hand.
So this is my life now? Laying in bed texting about Hulk penis?
We were like one big happy Eskimo family.
So my step mom just informed me she tells stories about me at work as a form of birth control for the girls that work there, not sure if i should be offended or proud.
there are LEGIT cum stains on my ceilling. ON THE CEILLING!! you tell me how the relationship was.
Randomize
