Btw the nut in my hair goes great with my outfit !!! :(
That reminds me...we need to get swords
Every once in a while you'd chuckle to yourself, and when I asked you what's so funny u replied "sometimes my toes tickle eachother"
He said I was trying to make the bouncer dance with me AS he was throwing me out
Want to get together for a boner voyage before you leave?
I once puked on the side of the hwy driving home and it somehow made me feel more Canadian. So don't rule it out
attractive or not, he has more than one book on serial killers. i'm gonna get out of here while i can
I just want brownies and waffles and someone to lick my tits
I'm pleased to know that your mom refers to me as "the ass piliager" now
You rode your bike four miles to my house. Yelled "I'm so high!" Then crashed into his car. It's a problem.
She had a glow in the dark pastie on her forehead the last time I saw her. That should help you find her.
he bit THROUGH my nipple
plus side, no need to pay for a piercing.
I've orgasmed so many times tonight I think I've become enlightened
Also, apparently I'm only coherent when I'm drunk sexting. And then I'm grammatically perfect and impressively eloquent.
I got a message the other day that just said “great tits”
A gentleman AND a scholar
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