we're at the bar and some girl dropped a bottle of burnettes strawberry vodka out of her purse and it broke.
i mean, if that's not class, then i don't know what is
Saying she let herself go implies she was actually holding on
Reindeer Drinking Games will soon commence. Get over here while we're still sober enough to answer the door.
you ever feel like there is a sober person insided you pointing and laughing....?
dont try to nair your balls. i speak from experience
As it would turn out, "jesusssssss" is not the password to enter Faith Chapel's wifi network.
he was already passed out before we got there, so i already knew i was going to like him
Woke up naked wearing mismatched earrings. Didn't even make it to the bar.
I DON'T WANT TO DEMONSTRATE MY DICK TAKING ABILITIES WITH MY MOM THERE.
I love how you sexted me before you told me happy birthday. Thank you.
Tell me why I woke up outside of our hotel room Wearing a cowboy hat and boots in Las Vegas.
Santa tracker drinking game, you in or what?
We fucked on the roof... like that has to mean something
I'll start cleaning the house tonight darlin. So you don't have to fuck your two boytoys in the driveway the next two days.
I just made the same noise looking at my salami sandwich as I do hooking up with you.
Randomize
